I remember I was very much single when the first episode of the Bachelorette aired. I even remarked to my family that I would love that option of choosing a mate (except for the part that all the details of each of your relationships become public knowledge.) Each week I watched as Trista got closer and closer to her choice and ultimately she made a choice that I found somewhat surprising at first but a choice that has served her well. Her other choice seemed to have it all together, had all the right words and presented a “perfect” package. Ryan did not appear to have all that fancy packaging but his sincerity shone through. Ryan and Trista have been one of the few successful couples from the series and after more than twelve years of marriage, they appear to be still going strong.
So what do I think Trista did differently or perhaps what did she do particularly well in selecting the right man for herself? Well she learnt from her past relationship. She was the first runner up on the first season of the Bachelor and she had to endure all the pain of being rejected by someone for whom she cared deeply. But instead of wallowing in self-pity she ventured out again to find love armed with important lessons from her past relationship. She was able to see beyond the superficial. She also took full advantage of her time dating to get to know each person better. Lessons that could be useful for any woman who is dating in the hope of finding a life partner.
I sincerely wish Ben and Lauren well for the future. But my message is really for JoJo, another courageous woman who despite being heartbroken publicly has decided to risk it all again for love. I hope she has learnt from her most recent experience and any experience that she has had in the past. I hope she remains open to the men who will try to win her heart but to be discerning and separate their words from their actions. I hope that among her options is a man that truly loves and deserves her. I hope she is able to fully enjoy each of her experiences without any care of the impression she is making on her suitors and I wish her all the best on her journey that could lead to one of the most important decisions of her life.